This isn't really an update just more of thoughts towards whether or not to let my parents/grandparents know about us trying.
I want to start off by saying how much I adore my parents and grandparents. I know they love me and I'm really grateful that they haven't disowned me or hate me for living my life for who I am. However, in past conversations my mom and my grandmother, both who say whatever is on their minds without thinking (it's just who they are) have made it clear about how they feel about me having a child with Amity. After a while though my mom has said do what you want I'll spoil the kid anyway. It's like she says that but at the same time you can tell that she doesn't want me to raise a child in "non- normal family environment".
It's not that they don't like Amity, they do. My grandparents adore her, so does my mom. They just don't like the situation and I don't expect them to fully accept it. They don't feel that it's appropriate. That's fine everyone has their own opinion. I just don't want to feel like the worse person in the world.
I just don't want to put my life on hold and wait till they pass away to start my family.
So here's the dilemma. I have yet to tell them that we're actually in the process of working on building our family. Amity's whole family knows. Only Josh and Sylvia of my immediate family knows and they're totally excited. I want to tell my mom so we're not springing it on her after the fact. Amity wants to wait so I'm not stressing out over more then I need to. But honestly I stress out more when I'm not sure what my parents are thinking, and what's gonna happened. But I'm scared to say anything.
So should I say something or should I wait?
deal with it now girl, you don't want the stress when you're prego, it's no bueno.
ReplyDeleteThat's what I say. amity's concern that if I tell them now that what if they don't agree to it and what would I do? change my mind? I don't think I will. I'm thinking I'm just gonna tell my mom and she'll tell everyone.
ReplyDeleteJust do it. Getting it all out is easier than trying to hide it.
ReplyDeleteHonesty is the beat policy. Hey didnt Abraham Lincoln say that lol
ReplyDeleteHi :) so I don't usually.comment at all but I think I need to on this.let me start by saying when Manda told me I wanted to kill her!! Not cuz I thought "she ruined her life" or "what will other people think" or "I'm too young to be a grandma".it was cuz I thought she knew better considering I was up front with her about having her young. I think Manda felt she "had it.handled" which we all know she didn't. So I was able to help her.You obviously are older than her but you will want/need help from.your mom and she will always love you no matter what your.life brings....it might.just be a little.scary for her?? This was so much better the first time I wrote it!!
ReplyDeleteI think you should talk to your mom now. Part of me (the really immature, spiteful part) thinks that you should just not say anything and let them think you're getting super fat (which is what my grandparents thought when my mom got pregnant with Ashley), and then just be like "boom goes the dynamite, I have a kid." But the logical, adult part of me thinks that telling your family earlier would be better. Like Mindy said, you don't want to deal with that stress after you're pregnant. Also, actually telling your mom will probably suck, but the earlier you do it, the more time your family will have to wrap their heads around it and accept it. Hopefully after having some time to get used to it, they'll be more receptive to you guys having a baby than they otherwise might be.
ReplyDeleteI would wait until you're pregnant. Then there is no stopping it. Its your life and this is what you both want. I know that Nanan and your mom love you a lot, its just a hard pill for them to swallow. Good luck.
ReplyDelete